28th November 2018

We are not celebrities get me in there! 8 girls arrived to the court at 7pm to play basketball. After warm ups in the jungle we were split into 2 teams by Coach Leader Josephine.
The Purple team Sally, Lisa, Laurie, and Shirley versus Blue team Louise, Nancy, Sarita and Tulay. The first trial was to win the jump ball, Sarita won the jump but lost the star to Sally who was first to score. Within seconds Nancy had evened the score. 2 meals for camp. Task 2 was trickier, Louise had to steal the ball, run to the basket, trampoline off Sally’s tummy to win the star. 3 meals for camp to the blue team. Next Shirley threw the ball from afar intercepted by Sarita, Lisa stepped in with her size 7’s! Coach Jo Squash blew the whistle. Both teams were hungry, critters or no critters they had to score!
The blue team grabbed the dingo dollars while the Purple team eat the witchity grub. Tulay’s rebounds were caught on camera in her white bikini under the shower. Laurie got all her team mates cheering as she scored her 3 meals for Camp. On the last trial Jo joined the purple team to help clean up the dunny. Sally was declared Queen of the Jungle for the purple team. The Blue team snaked to glory with Sarita wearing the crown for most spider baskets scored by one camp mate. A great game eat by all.
C U next Wednesday

21st November 2018

Chimpanzees Tea party

Its Black Tea Wednesday. The court was in a state! Chalk, filth, water, equipment and Feathers had to be cleared before we could play.
With a late tea start we warmed the pot and got into 2 teas to play. The 4 Orange Pekoe’s (Louise, Sarita, Shirley and Tulay with a touch of Lady Grey Jo) versus the 5 Black Darjeeling’s, (Dania, Nancy, Sally, Gill and Andreea) Sarita won the volley but the ball jumped cup giving Gill the first dip in the pot. The Orange Pekoes kept the kettle on the boil, taking both the cup and saucer! Sarita might have made the best drink of the day but guess who had Tea with the Queen’ ME!  Nancy gave us some gunpowder shots, while Typhoo Andreea Lipton’ed off with the caddy! Sally leisurely tetley scored at Lyons tea house. Tulay found herself caffeine free to score under the basket. Dania made a blend of her own lap’sanging the ball across the key straight to her net tea shirt. While Lady Jo Grey served up PG tips and called the seconds. Fouled Sarita got tea for 2 at the free throw line. Shirley took regular fast tea breaks going all the way! OoLang! Sarita with a wounded pinky and took herself off the court for a hot sweet cup of Rosie lea. Taking her place Lady Jo Grey took a high tea shoot-out from the behind the three point line, unfortunately sugar lumps from the coach don’t count!  At 8pm Game Matcha was over! Time to tea trolly home. C U NEXT WEDNESDAY for more fun on the court and less trash on the floor. A PG tip to the staff

14th November 2018

From the Biscuit tin 2 Custard Creams and Sarita’s Garibaldi friend watching from the side.
The Rich Teas in Purple (4 Dania, Rhonda, Andrea, Tulay and part-timer Jo Jo) versus The Hob Nobs in Blue (5 Louise, Lisa, Sarita, Laurie and Shirley) After some Nice shooting lay-ups, jump-ups and warm-ups drills we were ready to Crumble.
Sarita won the Jump, Shirley cut and took the biscuit to make the first basket, followed by a second pink wafer. Digestive Dania and Andreea followed suit evening the score as they slam-dunked their Oreo’s. Louise was shortbread. After a quick tea break Coach Josephine assorted us into key tins, Macarooned on elbows and blocks. All confused our cookies crumbled. Lost and assaulted Lisa and Sarita both took a biscotti from the free throw line. During the game Tulay got a McVit to the head and sat on the side, Josephine stepped in for her giving the purple cream a jammy dodger from behind the 3 point line. Meanwhile Dania flap jacked, Andreea Chocolate chipped them in. Laurie Jaffa caked and Rhonda became the Biscuiteer of the evening. At 8pm the Brisxit result ‘will Mr Kipling have to stock pile to sell into the EU?’
We all left cream crackered! Welcome back Andreea and Rhonda both thoroughly missed,
See you next week for more pure bourbon and some ginger nut play on the court.

7th November 2018

The Festival of Lights Diwali versus Bonfire night. Coach Josephine was first to arrive shoving a firework to up the arse of the lazy little Venice staff! At 7.07 our session started late. Our 2 Teams: The 5 Bonfire of the Vanities Louise, Minna, Lisa, Gill and Dania in Fashionable Black versus the 4 Diwali Goddesses in Purple, Sarita, Shirley, Laurie and Tulay. Josephine lit the blue touch paper and stood well back as the game began.
Sarita the Ganesha goddess used one of her many arms to win the jump, but firework Minna sparked across the court igniting the first 2 crackers for the Bonfires. Goddesses Ganasha and Krishna turned Blue to score for their team. Lisa exploded all her bangers scoring 5 sparklers in a row. Guy Fawkes’s crew won the first 2 games. Game 3 Diwali took the help of Coach Josephine to make it 5 on 5 to win the victory of light. Tulay won the rebound stealing from Dania. Shirley broke free to score and Laurie caught the ball. At 8pm Dania whipped the ball and blew up parliament BOOM! The Big Ben’s came running in. Game over. The Goddesses had turned from blue to red and Guy Fawkes was put on the bonfire. We all left hot and exhausted knowing that good had won over evil, and Knowledge over ignorance. Which is not quite true as Trump is still in power and no one knows anything about Brexit..